Growing up, most of us have had wonderful moments and memories as children! Endless games in the park during summer vacations, funny days playing pranks in school, sleeping peacefully in the arms of our parents are some nostalgic times to visit back.
Life was easy and laughter was aplenty. However, as we grew into adults going through various phases of college, graduation, and finally job, marriage, and having kids of our own, life became harder. So what shifted? Did the times change or did we? Or was it a bit of both?
12 reasons why is life so hard
As responsibilities grew with each stage so did our worries. Even though we each have our apprehensions in life depending on our circumstances some common reasons plague us all making life harder than we pictured growing up. Here are some of them :
1. Being tethered to the past:
Nowadays it is hard enough to be completely present mentally in the now, what with various distractions such as social media on our phones. However, life is tough when we are still busy reliving the moments in our past. Particularly if they are unpleasant memories.
Ranging from heartbreaks to failures or even grave memories lie losses of loved ones, these cause us nothing but sadness and pain if we still cling to them in the present.
Some of us even have happy memories we reminisce about, sometimes quite often. We must remember that past glories and achievements are done and dusted. There is no point wasting our time over them. The present is the time to set more goals and work towards greater wins.
2. Keeping unrealistic goals in life:
Every one of us has had dreams of working in a high-paying job, owning a big house with a family, and setting off on annual vacations. But what we don't realize is the sheer amount of hard work and discipline it takes to achieve these. What we see in our dreams is the end-product.
Many people make the mistake of planning to achieve these goals in an unrealistic frame of time. E.g. trying to drop 100 pounds in a month. Without knowing about diet, exercise, fat burning patterns, etc, we get disappointed when we are only able to lose instead 20 pounds in a week.
Had we analyzed weight loss regimes and dietary plans to set an achievable target we would be happy with even a 20-pound loss. This would have also given us a sense of achievement.
3. Comparing yourself to others:
Many times we look at others and think that the grass is greener on the other end. We look at our friend's expensive car or huge house and wish we were in their place. However, not everyone reveals their difficulties to others. Especially in social media, all these Instagram models or families that show their perfect life make us wish for the same.
But we don't know of the amount of maintenance needed for such a life or the social pressures that come with it. Most models use filters to get the perfect look on camera. It is difficult being in the limelight constantly. Instead, we must focus our energies on improving our own life and achieving our dreams. We must be proud of our accomplishments without comparing them with others.
4. Caring about the opinions of others:
This trait has been instilled in most people since a young age and has been a major cause of unhappiness. Life is not easy when we are constantly living in the fear of what others think of us.
Sometimes even when we take crucial decisions or when we plan to follow our dreams this question always pops up - What will he/she think? We then get discouraged to live life the way we please and give in to social pressure.
5. Lack of self-awareness:
When we are unaware of who we are and what we want in life, we endlessly chase jobs and people and are dissatisfied most of the time. This is why life is tough.
The more we explore our inner selves and know who we are, the more choose jobs that suit us or date people that we like. This brings a tremendous amount of happiness in the long run and makes life easy. Self-love is the key to contentment in life.
6. Have a constant negative outlook:
Life is full of painful struggles and bad things happen to good people. When we constantly see only the bad instances in our life we become discouraged and feel as if success will never be ours.
In these times, life seems pretty hard. But such times do not last. When we learn to look at bad situations as learning experiences even the negative becomes positive.
7. Tremendous societal pressure to conform:
Everyone is expected to have a certain lifestyle in society. A decent job, cozy two-storied home or two-bedroom apartment, a good-looking partner, and two sweet children. Anybody who strays from this path is shunned and ignored.
This fear of being an outcast is what makes most people give up on their dreams and conform. Over time this becomes suffocating and makes life tough for a lot of people.
8. Life is unfair:
We live in a society wherein in today's world the rich are getting richer and the poor are getting poorer. There are welfare schemes for the poor and tax rebates for the rich. But what about the majority of middle-class people?
Ever since we are born, we have to painfully struggle to get into good schools, good colleges, and even get good jobs. Due to overpopulation, even that is hard. The rich can pay their way through everything whereas the poor and middle-class are left helpless. This unfairness in society is a cause of many hardships in life.
9. No emotional intelligence or control:
Man is a social, emotional animal. When we have no control over our emotions, then we may end up taking impulsive and rash decisions that may end up making life harder.
It is important to learn and practice a certain degree of emotional intelligence to make sound decisions in life that might save us a lot of pain in the future. Sometimes, such bad decisions may also cost us monetarily.
10. No purpose or goals in life:
Our jobs and relationships become more meaningful when we have a purpose attached to them. Without an end goal in life, our actions start becoming empty and we keep questioning the reason for doing things and being with people.
Getting lost in this endless existential crisis cycle gets a person lost and depressed eventually and life is hard for such people. Instead, we must just choose a path and not dwell too much on the purpose of life and just enjoy the journey at the dawn of each day.
11. Finding our happiness in others:
Most of us become involved in making other people happy, be it our friends or loved ones. When we see them happy our heart smiles. This may work for a while but in the long term, it may become tiresome when we don't see our actions reciprocated.
The truth is everyone is busy with their own lives and so we feel left out. This unhappiness translates to us thinking why is life hard? Instead, do things and explore hobbies that make you happy, and gradually you will be able to enjoy your own company and find life smooth sailing.
12. No balance in life:
When any activity is done at an extreme, it slowly burns us out and we may lose interest in it completely. So, it's important to have balance in life.
When we only do activities we like such as binging on Netflix, playing video games 24x7, etc instead of everyday boring tasks like cleaning and other household chores, our house may end up messy and we end up ordering and eating outside food.
This not only affects our health but also our moods and everyday life. We may eventually end up feeling life is hard and get stuck in an endless loop of binging and playing. It's important to manage our time well and perform both our chores and hobbies in a balanced way.
Conclusion :
Life is generally full of struggles, but it has its fair share of happy days too. But with a few good habits like meditation, being in the present, and managing our time efficiently we can strive to make life a bit easier.
The key is not to take ourselves and life too seriously all the time. Life is not a destination or a goal to be met. It is a journey that has to be taken a single day at a time while savoring every moment.
When we are in the present pursuing our hobbies and goals with full focus, the peace we feel is often unmatched keeps us distracted from constantly thinking about the hardships of life.
Harsh Agarwal
Life itself is known as struggle, trouble, and happiness. It becomes hard because of us only. It is not meant to be so hard, but it can be due to some reasons. There are some points which should be followed properly to make it smooth enough. But here we discuss the points which can make our life hard.
Why do we make our life hard?
The points are following because of which we make our life hard and trouble:
1. You never finish what you start.
Bounty of shrewd men has said, “Beginning is simple; wrapping up is difficult.” Whereas it is critical to know when to toss within the towel, you’ve got to be persistent and willing to see a project through. Remember that victory never happens overnight, and anything truly worth doing takes time and exertion.
2. You give up too easily.
We all have those minutes when we can fair toss everything out the window. In reality, that feeling may take final days or weeks. The thing is, victory doesn’t come simple. It’s a portion of the travel. Fair, since things aren’t going your way right presently, it doesn’t cruel that you simply ought to give up on your trust and dreams. Infant steps.
3. You don’t believe in yourself.
On the off chance that you do not accept in yourself, at that point, are you willing to form any genuine endeavors? Indeed, on the off chance that it’s celebrating a little triumph, like getting the contact information of a potential client, you wish to discover ways that will grant your certainty a boost.
Do not run yourself down to others or indeed to yourself. It more often than not takes exertion and doing the difficult work that grants real superior self-esteem.
4. You haven’t Managed your money properly.
Not overseeing cash appropriately is one of the most reasons a little commerce comes up short. Indeed, in your personal life, be that as it may, this could be an issue. If you’re investing as well much cash in differentiate to what you’re bringing, at that point, how can you anticipate paying your bills and set cash aside for crises or retirement?
Set a budget and follow it. On the off chance that requires be, get in touch with a monetary counsel. Many cities have monetary offer assistance for gratis, instructing you how to require care of cash. Grown-up instruction classes are moreover held on this subject for a little charge.
The exceptionally step is to include up precisely what your set bills are and have that figure in your intellect all the time. Rather than eating out, go domestic and have a can of soup once in a whereas.
5. You aren’t constantly learning
Effective people continuously search for ways to upgrade their lives by learning unused data or abilities. Whether it’s perusing a book or taking part in a webinar, don’t pass up any opening that can assist you in developing as an individual. One of the top ways I have found to keep learning is to be fascinated by things that others are doing.
Everybody is a master at something. You’ll get an incredible mini-class from that master. This may construct incredible fellowships, as well. Now and then, you’ve got to set aside fear.
6. You’re Not passionate
If you’re not adoring what you are doing, you’ll put 50% exertion once you ought to be putting 100%. Without energy, you won’t remain propelled and persuaded, particularly when times get extreme.
7. You stay in your comfort zone
Your consolation zone may be a put where you’re feeling secure and guaranteed. Whereas that consolation zone is required from time to time, remaining in your consolation zone eventually leads to stagnation, and now and then, it can lead to fear. You’ll never be able to develop and create in case you remain in one put.
8. You’re not as productive as you could be.
Fair since you’re working 8 or more hours a day doesn’t cruel that you’re really profitable. Between diversions, break, and investing as well much time on one errand, you’ll actually only be working one or two hours a day. Contribute to time administration and time tracking tools to find how beneficial your days truly are so simple can make the fitting changes.
9. You become emotional very quickly.
You become emotional very easily. You started overthinking for even a single matter. You become attached to everyone whom you meet, which is a highly loose point of you. Sometimes it is proven as a sign of a toxic person.
10. You cannot overcome with the wrong ones.
When you cannot overcome the negative things that happen in your life, Life becomes tough. You have to go with the positive things. It is not easy when you can’t overcome it, but you have to try with your 100% strategy.