karishma Archana
20,342 pts
Guru
Writing is in progress...............
Writing is my hobby, and I am working hard to make it my profession. I write more about the lifestyle, and I love to express my thoughts.
How is a society built up? How do people know what the other person is trying to say? How can two persons exchange their emotions and feelings?
Through words, right? Yes, so, stories are an essential aspect of the world. Without the comments, you are like dummies. Think of a world where you don't have a medium to express your emotions. Either you don't know how to put those words in such a series, where you stand like a clear about your thoughts. Putting your words in such a series, where the other person understands it exactly, can say a good conversation.
You live in a society where, without having a conversation, you can not survive. Discussions are the only medium to exchange thoughts. If the conversation has this much importance in our life, it has to be the best.
Talking is not always a conversation. If your understanding what the upfront person is saying and the upfront person is getting what you are talking about exactly, this will be an excellent conversation. Everyone knows how to use words. But, sometimes, you might forget those factors that can make your conversation skills better.
This article will cover some key points that will help you out to improve your conversation skills. So, let's start.
1) Talk Slowly
I have a friend who speaks too fast. So, half of his statements, I can not catch up. You also might have experienced it sometime. So, this exactly what I am trying to say. Speak slowly. This does not mean that you have to go very slow. But speak at such a speed, so that another person can catch each word.
Otherwise, your conversation will be left with just the formalities of having a name. At least, speak in the speed, which is catchable to everyone.
2) Hold More Eye Contact
When you don't hold eye contact while talking, you are not interested in the conversation. Instead, the experts also suggest maintaining eye contact when you are at any interview process. It reflects your confidence. I have seen many people who can not hold eye contact. And this is one of the primary reasons why your conversation can go wrong. If you are confident about your point and want to make your conversation effective, learn to hold eye contact.
3) Positive Body Language
It is also called as a non-verbal conversation. Not everyone, but you will find many people out there in your surrounding who can understand body language. Your body language is the first one who speaks before you start a conversation. And trust me, body language says more than what you speak. Each gesture is a word in itself. So, it is advisable to keep your body language positive. So the upfront person gets interested in talking to you.
4) Notice the Details
It is a good sign if you are aware of each word taking place in your conversation. It also helps you in starting and continuing the discussion. If you are habitual of noticing the minor details within the conversation, you make a good conversation. People have words with those who can detect and prevent the details of what they said. And this can make your discussion healthy.
5) Give Unique Compliments
If you know how to make anyone happy with your compliments, you can win the heart. People like those persons who give them compliments. But, your praise should have to be genuine. It should not like, you have to give it, and you just said, without being aware of the reality.
For example, if someone is looking good. But, in the practice of praising the person, you over-praised by uttering the different colors of the dress. It can ruin all your conversations. Your compliments should be unique but should be reliable to the fact.
6) Express Your Emotions
Don't be a mystery. Be yourself, be real with your emotions. You can connect more easily to people if you can express your real feelings. At the same time, it needs the skill to understand what and where you have to express.
You can not express your happy feeling in a sad place. Instead of making a good conversation, it can hamper your personality too. Also, expressing your emotions with the correct words is what most important. Finding the right words to describe your real feelings can strengthen your conversation.
7) Use the Best Words
As I said earlier, words are the foundation of your conversation. How do you use the words? Are the words you are using essential at the place? How will this word impact on someone's emotion?
These are the common questions you need to ask yourself. And accordingly, use the best words while having a conversation. It is not essential to use only the best terms. But, it is indeed necessary to know what words you are using in your dialogue. The terms can either make your conversation healthier or weaker.
8) Ask Questions
It is advisable to ask questions than assuming something that might not relate to the fact. It is okay that if you don't understand something in one go. So, in such a situation, always ask questions to clear your doubt.
You are asking questions is also a good sign to show that you are involved and interested in the conversation. You are asking questions to do no harm to your discussion. Instead, it makes it more interesting.
9) Listen Carefully
Conversation completes when both the parties are exchanging thoughts. It can not be one is speaking, and the other is listening carefully. But listening is vital before speaking. If you don't listen to the upfront person, how will your revert?
You can say, listening is the first step towards a healthy conversation. If you can be a good listener, you can be a part of a good conversation.
10) Make Reading a Habit
Why am I listing reading in the factors of improving conversation skills? If someone is talking to you about some serious topic, but you don't know a bit about the case, how will you continue the conversation?
Reading will boost up your knowledge. And you will be more confident while having the words with anyone. Also, you will go through some great topics that can help you polish your conversation. These things can stand like the highlights in your discussion.
11) Be Approachable
Do people ask you, "How are you feeling?" " Are you fine?" " How are you doing?" Etc. It is because you are easy to approach. People likely to like easily accessible people. They would prefer to talk with somebody who is smooth while talking, whether it shows the attitude. Passing a smile, gesturing of the eyebrows quick up and down are some signs that you are the one people can talk to.
12) Don't Interrupt
No one likes to get interrupted. You feel so irritating if someone has a habit of frequent interrupting. So, if you can get irritated, then he can not. Will another person feel the same? But still, if you interrupt someone in the middle of his statement, you can handle the situation and make the conversation breathing again by saying, " You were at XYZ before I interrupt you?" This gesture says a lot in itself. And you don't ruin any conversation.
13) Be Aware of "Same Here" Moment
People are likely to like the person who is like them. Remember the last time, when you said someone, 'same here,' and the smile popped up on the face. The ‘same here’ element could be anything like a familiar place, familiar TV show, food, etc. And, don't only stop saying the ‘same here.’ You can start a new conversation from this 'same here' thing.
14) Daily Practice
Practice makes a man perfect, is a famous saying. It encourages me to work more and more. Even a singer can not sing a melody song if he doesn't practice daily. A cricketer would not get a bit to hit the ball if he left the training. You can not win the race only with one day of training. You have to tie your shoes daily. Make it a part of your routine. And after a while, you will notice it's an effect on your conversation.
15) Know Yourself
It is the most critical aspect of the skills. No one can know you better than yourself. You know, what are your leading areas and the lagging areas. Either you can not lie with yourself. Knowing yourself helps you putting yourself as a real person. You don't have to fake anything. And people like the real stories, instead of going with the image imaginary ones. So, be yourself and know yourself.
Here, I have listed some crucial factors to improve conversation skills. Look at those elements and find your lagging area. Start working on it and come up as a new and improved you.
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Once there was a farmer who used to sell 10 kg of butter to a shopkeeper. He has become the regular seller of the shopkeeper. One day the shopkeeper thought of measuring the butter, whether the farmer gives him the correct quantity or not. So, after buying the butter, the shopkeeper measures the butter and found that it was less than 10 kg.
The shopkeeper takes the farmer to court. The judge asks the farmer," why did you cheat the shopkeeper. Instead of giving him the correct measurement, which alias used to provide him with less quantity."
The farmer replied that he doesn't have anything to measure the quantity. He only has one measurement using that; he gives the butter to the shopkeeper.
Judge asked the farmer, "what is it?"
The farmer replied, "I purchase 10 kg of bread from the shopkeeper. And, in the same container, I put butter in it and sell it to the shopkeeper."
He continues, "if he has found the butter, less than 10 kg, he might have sold be the bread less than the right quantity."
The Morel: You might have heard that you give will come back to you for sure. I don't know in what form, but you will get it anyway. If you give respect, you wi be respected. You give grief; you will receive sadness. This story is the best example that proves; Every action has equal and opposite reactions.
The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will. Vince Lombardi
One day, in a seminar, the host ask 150 people to play a game. First, he asks them to pick up a balloon and write their name on it. When the people do it, the host asks them to go into a room and drop their balloon in the empty space.
The people return to him, dropping their balloon. Then the host asks the same group to go to the room and take their balloon and come back here. Everyone goes to the room and looks for their balloon. While looking for the balloon, there push other people aside, go over them, and through others balloon aside from them.
They were asked to come back in two minutes. And after the time is done, everyone returns with an empty hand. The host again asks the same group to go to the room, pick up a random balloon, and return it to the balloon's owner. After two minutes, everyone returns with their balloons in their hand.
The host says, "this is what we do in real life also. We keep aside other's happiness to look for ourselves. But we forgot that if you can't make others happy, you can be satisfied too. "
The Morel: The secret of happiness is, be helping to others. Find your joy in other's happiness. When you give a smile to other's faces, you will ultimately get a reason to smile. You don't have to run for joy when you help others. And, success can be achieved in the same way. By helping others and taking others together, you can get win only.
I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. Michael Jordan
There was a company, who's boss was so strict, and employees didn't like him at all. One day, when all the employees come to the office, they see a notice on the door, "the one who was holding you back died yesterday. Please gather in the seminar hall for condolences."
Reading this notice, every one of them thinks that the boss dies. They feel so sad. And everyone started moving to the auditorium. When they enter the hall, they see the boss sitting on the chair fit and refined and a coffin placed in front of him. Each one of them was shocked, who is died then.
One by one, everyone comes to the coffin and sees inside it. But, when they looked inside the coffin, everyone was shocked. As, inside the coffin, there was a mirror only where they saw their own images.
Besides the mirror, there was a letter, "The person who was holding you back is you. There is no other person in the world who can hold you back rather than you. You are the biggest speed breaker for your success. Unless and until you understand this fact, you can't get success."
The Morel: The one who is the doer is you for yourself. You can make you successful and unsuccessful at times. No one can hold you at any sort of time.
Only you can keep you and release you to do something extraordinary. Don't put limits on yourself. Be limitless. You have the best relationship with you. If people are blaming you, making fun of you based on your efforts, it means you are logging at some point. So, don't blame others for their perception of you. As somewhere you have given them a reason to think like this.
Once, there was a man who was so intelligent. People know him and their work. And they used to appreciate him due to his works. He used to calculate and study every single thing that he was doing. Then, one day, he notices that his shoes are going to tire soon. He realized that he had worked so hard, and as a result, his shoes will be split into two parts.
He decided to buy a pair of shoes. So he thinks of going online and looking for the shoes that are best suited for him. Meanwhile, he also believes that what if he bought the wrong pair. So, he wanted to be sure before purchasing the shoes. So, he takes off all the books that he was appreciated the most. And after too much research, he finally reaches the solution that how he needs to buy shoes.
He makes all the measurements using the scales. On the next day, he went to the shop and selected a pair of shoes. But then he realized that he had forgotten the scale at home. So he goes back home, but he realized that his boots are torn. And he has to walk to the house barefoot.
In a school, one camp was organized for the students. The counselor comes to the auditorium and asks students to share their experiences that have hurt them badly.
One of the students stood up and said that one of his friends says something to him that had hurt them so badly. And, they can not forget what their friend has told them.
Then the counselor puts up the chalk and breaks it into two parts. Then they ask the students whether anyone can join it back and make it like before. Everyone says no.
Then the counselor says, "like, you can not join this chalk back, and make it like before, you can not take your words back. Your words are the most powerful. So, use it wisely. It may give you an injury severe than any of the weapons."
The Morel: We can not live without talking with each other. Being in a conversation, words are the most important things that help have a good relationship and bond. Conversely, if you use the wrong words, your most robust relationship can be faded away.
Right words heal, where bad words injure you the severe. You can't take the terms back. Once you said something that could hurt the feelings of somebody, your 100 times "I'm sorry" can't make it right. Take some time to think before you utter a word. You should know what to speak and when to speak. As if you learn to speak wisely, you are successful.
Success is achieved and maintained by those who try and keep trying. W. Clement Stone
Once, there was a Carpenter who was nearby his retirement. He goes to his boss and informs him about his retirement. The boss got sad, as the carpenter was one of the best employees he had ever.
The boss asked the carpenter to build the last house for him before his retirement. Though the man didn't want to do it, he agreed to do so. And he started working in it. He was such an experienced and knowledgeable person. But, as it was his last house, who doesn't take too much effort, uses average interiors, and so on.
When it gets ready, he gives the key of the house to the boss, and the boss provides access to the carpenter's return, saying, " it is the gift for you from my side."
The carpenter thinks that if the world has known that it is for him, he would have taken the double efforts and gave a quality product.
The Morel: We often save our energy for the next day, which we don't know, what and how it will be. This story teaches us to give 100% at the moment. You waste your time giving excuses and then complaining about the outcome. If you don't give your best, how can you get the best?
Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming. John Wooden
In a classroom, a professor asks a student to come forward. When he comes out, the professor asks him to put his hands on a level outside his body alignment. When he does it, he puts two books in his hands. And ask the student if it is heavy or not. The student says it's very light.
After 5 minutes, the professor again asked the student if it is heavy or not. The student again replied the same. Then, the professor gets busy interacting with the class. After 15 minutes, the professor repeats the same question. This time, the student replied, he is feeling muscle pain. Then the professor asked him to go back to his seat.
The professor explains that if the boy had held the book for 1 hour, he might feel keeping the heaviest thing. But, if he holds the book for a day or the week, his hand may feel paralyzed and numb.
Similarly, the book refers to the stress and worries in your life. If you hold them for few minutes, that's ok. Buy, if you have them for much time, it will give you pain, mentally and physically. It will help if you let go of them as soon as possible. Otherwise, they will paralyze your brain.
The Morel: If you can't hold your happiness for longer, why do you carry your stress everywhere you go. It will give you nothing but sadness and more anxiety. Let go of your tension. Don't carry them everywhere. Free up your mind so that they can have a space for new ideas.
Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it. Bruce Lee
There was an older man who had five sons. The man was rich, but he was old now. His sons always used to fight with each other. And, the man was so stressed due to this behavior of his son. Now, their fight was raised before ever, and the people around them used to make fun of them for fighting all the time.
One day, he gets sick. He wanted his son to be united before he died. So, he calls his sons and says, "dear, if you do what I will ask you to do, in less time, you will get the rewards for it." Everyone gets agreed.
Now the man gives each one of them a bundle of 10 sticks to break and asks them to divide it into two half. Whoever will do it in less time will be the winner. So, the sons started breaking the sticks and finish the task in very little time. But, now, they again began to fight, who did the first.
The man says, "the task is not finished yet." He again gives a bundle of 10 sticks to each one of them and asks them to beak it in one go rather than to break them individually. After many tries, no one can break it. And the admission that they are failed.
Once, there was a king who was so helpful. He has a person in his kingdom who was so clever. And the king used to admire the person the most.
One day, the king and the person goes the riverside. They were talking and discussing some severe topic.
Meanwhile, the king draws a line on the coast of the river and asked the man to reduce the length of the line without touching it or wiping it. After thinking for some time, the man draws an extensive line aside from the last line and tells the king that his line is shorter.
The King gets pleased with the man again.
The Morel: Try to look for the options around you. If you keep yourself closed in a box, don't let yourself breathe in the air, you won't be able to survive. Put yourself in extreme conditions to know your capabilities. Make your mind living. Think out of the box.
Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life - think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success. Swami Vivekananda
A man used to walk his dog every day in the morning. Every week he was noticing a woman nearby a lake. Week after week passed by. And then he finally goes to the woman asked, " would you mind if I ask, what do you do here every week?"
The woman had a cage beside her, three turtles on her lap, and the fourth one in her hand; she was wiping with a sponge.
She smiled and replied, "I'm cleaning the argue and scum that grows upon the turtle's shell as it would reduce their ability to soak heat and reduce their swimming capacity. It so can get corrode and got weaken with time. I do it every weekend."
The man smiles and says, "But do you think you are making a huge difference? As there are not so many people in the world who do this. And the other turtles may be living with the algae and scums."
The women replied, "if these turtles were talking, they would say, I'm making a huge difference."
The Morel: You may not change the world, but you can change someone's life. You may not matter for the world, but it might be the world for someone. Only because you can't change the world doesn't mean you shouldn't try to help people. You might never know; your small help can make a huge difference in someone's life.
Success is sweet and sweeter if long delayed and gotten through many struggles and defeats. Amos Bronson Alcott
Two kids, a boy, and a girl, were playing on the ground afternoon. First, the boy shows the girl his collection of the pabbles, which was too beautiful. Then the girl also shows him her collection of candies.
They both make a deal of exchanging this collection. The girl gives her all the candies to the boy. Boy gives all of his pabbles to the girl. But, he keeps one of the most beautiful and big stones to him, without her knowledge. And they both were so happy.
In the night, the girl was so happy that she has got a perfect collection. And she goes to sleep thinking about the pabbles. But, on the other hand, the boy could not sleep, as he thinks, if the girl has also put some candies on her, as he did.
The Morel: What you give, that you take. Whatever the relationship is, trust is essential. If one is cheating, he will always think that the other person is also cheating him. As you believe, you grow up. So, think positive. Be honest. It is the ultimate secret to your success.
Desire is the key to motivation, but it's determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek. Mario Andretti
Once a boy asks an old man, "what is the secret of success?" The man told the boy that to meet him on the riverside the following day.
The boy gets ready and goes to the riverside the following day to meet the older man. The man and the boy started walking through the river till the boy's nose ducked in the water.
Now, the older man punches the boy's head inside the water and doesn't let him come up. The boy struggles a lot to come out, but the man pushes him in the opposite direction. The boy feels that a fish is swimming underneath his leg, and he tried to come up hard.
Now, the man pulls the boy and makes his breathing. And, asked him, "when you were inside the water, what did you want?" The boy replied, "The Air." Yeah, this is the secret of success.
Until and unless you want success, like wanting air, you can not achieve it.
The Morel: The desires give birth to Success. If you want to be in the pot, just because you can, you won't be able to get success. On the other hand, if you desire success as essential as the air, you will definitely go to get it.
The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way. Robert Kiyosaki
Once, a leader in a seminar hall shows the audience of 200 people a $50 pouch. Then he asked them, " who wants this pouch?" And everyone raises their hand in the air.
He said, "I will give this money to any one of you. But before that.....he asked one again, who wants the pouch?" And again, everyone agreed.
Then he tried to make as much money as possible as it hardly looks like wasted tissue paper. And, he again asked the audience whether they want it or not. And, everyone again agreed to have it.
The Morel: No matter how challenging your life is, how challenging the situation is, your life and the worth of your life don't decrease. Often you might face the case where you feel inadequate but remember your worth. And be proud of it. As if you value yourself, the world will love you.
You don't have to be a genius or a visionary or even a college graduate to be successful. You just need a framework and a dream. Michael Dell
Once, in a small village, there was a businessman who was having huge debts. And, he was not in the condition to return all his obligations to the bank. Moreover, the banker was an old and unappealing man who firmly wanted to marry that businessman's daughter.
One day, the business owner went to the banker and wanted to have a deal so that he doesn't have to pay the debts. Banker puts a condition of marrying his daughter. But, the business's owner didn't want to do that. But, he didn't have any choice to be debt-free as the debts were too huge to return.
He will put two stones in a bag, black and white. If the girl chooses the white stone blindly, the businessman's debts will be cleared, and the daughter will not have to marry him. And if she selects the black stone, she will have to marry him, and the debts will be cleared.
The banker picks up two black stones. The daughter was watching the banker from the window.
Once, A mommy camel and her newborn were turning in, soaking up the sun. The baby camel asked his mum, “Why are we with these large bumps on our back?”
The mammy thinks for some time and then said, “We are living in the desert where there is a shortage of water. Our humps reserve water to support us survive on long trips." The baby camel again questions, “Well, what is the use of these long legs with rounded feet?”
His mum answered back, “They are signified to enable us to walk through the sand.” The baby asked the third question, “Why are my eyelashes so long?”The mother answered, “Your long eyelashes you from sand when it hits in the wind.”
In the last, the baby asked, “if we all have the skills naturally to live our life, then what is the use of the Camels in Zoo?"
The Moral: It shows that your abilities won't have meaning until you use them. You might have heard about the persons, who have left their jobs to follow their dreams. Now, you have to decide, you either want to do your job only, or to live your dream. Maybe your plan gives you a struggle initially. But, it would help if you had the confidence that you will make a change. Think big, keep growing.
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure. Mark Twain
Once, there was a king. One day, he thought of experimenting on these people. So, he put a massive rock in the middle of the road, and hide nearby to see, what people do seeing the stone on the road.
After waiting for some time, he sees some wealthy merchants passing by. They walk by the rock, blaming the king that is not doing his duties. Then after some time, a peasant goes by the same way.
He had some heavy stuff over his head. Seeing the rock in the middle of the road, he stopped and tried to move the rock sideways.
It takes some time for him to clear the road, but he does it and goes back to his work. The next day, the same thing happens, but this time, there was a change.
He saw a sag filled with gold coins with a letter saying, "It is the reward for your work you did yesterday." It was the king who placed the sag for his work.
The Morel: Don't complain about things. Take action to make a change. You have the strength to challenge situations that look tough. So, go ahead, and challenge the challenging situation. Also, karma comes back. So, if your karma is good, you will get a good reward and vice versa.
Success is not measured by what you accomplish, but by the opposition you have encountered, and the courage with which you have maintained the struggle against overwhelming odds. Orison Swett Marden
A long time ago, a man was living at $99 social insurance bills, at the age of 65, in a small house. Even at the age of 65s, he wanted to do something to change his life. He was thinking about what he should do so that he can change his life. And, he had an idea. He thought of the selling fried chicken recipe that his family and friends loved.
With the thought, he leaves his home and visits various restaurants to sell his recipe. But he fails. He gets around 1009 Nos. He was also ready to give it for free, but no one agreed. In the last when he visited 1010 restaurants, he spawns a Yes.
His name is Colonel Hartland Sanders. And, the rest of the history, you know.
The Moral: This story gives you too many lessons. First is, it's never too late for a start. In the society of younger strength, Colonel Sanders has set an example; age is just a number. The second is belief in yourself. Have confidence in yourself. The third is consistency: one story, many lessons.
Success isn't measured by money or power or social rank. Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. Mike Ditka
Once, there was a seminar in an auditorium. The host asked people, "how many of you are moved on with your past?" Very few hands were raised. Then to change the environment, he cracks the joke, and everyone started laughing.
Then, the guy cracks the same joke for the second time. This time, very few people laugh. Then, he again cracks the joke. This time, no one laughed.
Then, he explains that if you can laugh at the same trick, why do you complain and stuck with your past?
Going back in the past and again and thinking about the past can't be the solution for any of the problems; it will not assist you with anything, anyway.
The Morel: People in this world are so happy and comfortable with their past. They keep complaining about the same and don't want to see the present and the future. Instead, they should learn to deal with the situation and start looking at every moment in a new way.
There are people who make things happen, there are people who watch things happen, and there are people who wonder what happened. To be successful, you need to be a person who makes things happen. Jim Lovell
Once, a man was coming to an elephant camp. He notices that all the elements were tied with a single rope, and it was tied in a leg only. Every elephant had the same situation. He got confused, so he goes to one of the trainers there.
He asks the trainer, "why the elephants are not breaking the rope and trying to get free. When they easily can do it. They have enough of the strength to do this."
The trainer replies to the man, "when the elephants were small, the rope was enough to hold them. The elephants are tied with the same rope from their childhood to adulthood. But, today also, the elephants think that they can't break the tope, and thus they don't try to do this."
The Morel: In the story, the elephants have made their opinions that they can't get through the situation when they easily can do it. They are stuck ad their past condition and don't even try to deal with the states with the new attitude.
The same thing applies to the human. If they have made any past mistakes, they think they should not repeat the situation without pain and failure.
Don't aim for success if you want it; just do what you love and believe in, and it will come naturally. David Frost
Once, a man came to know about a mine, where he was supposed to find the diamonds. He worked so hard for so long, quitting all his works.
After some time, it was so tiresome for him to continue his mining. And, he left the work. After some days, another man came to know about the incident. And he decides to keep the mining continue from where the first man leaves the work. As soon as he started, in two-three days, he gets the diamond.
The Morel: We learn here that never give up on anything. You might never know; the success could be just in front of you after some steps more.
Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. Booker T. Washington
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