Not Happening Your Way: solution and action plan.png

Life is like a great movie with lots of ups and downs. Similarly, our lives also have a lot of instances wherein our plans don’t follow our route or don’t work out the way we planned them to. We need to remember that everything is not in our control; various other factors influence decisions. Also, it’s completely normal to have some things way out of our schedule or plan. So what should you do if things don’t work your way? Do you get angry or overstressed? 


Additionally, do you ever give a thought if you are standing in between getting the work done? There can be multiple reasons for that. Stop focusing on the things you don’t have any control over. Instead, what you can do is work on yourself in these pretty stressful situations.


Here are 4 tips to help you do things your way.

– Remember why you are doing it

– Analyze the outcome

– Focus on the important stuff

– Listen to some soothing music

2 Ways To Be Patient.png


Here are some amazing tips to increase your patience level. 


WALK AROUND

Some people take a small stroll when breathing doesn’t help them find their calmness.


MEDITATION

Meditation is something that is helping people from ancient times to modern days with their life choices. The study says that 10 minutes of meditation each day helps us regain our hidden truth of ourselves. It increases our ability to focus on a single thing. It clears our vision of life. Gradually, you become a calmer person than before. 


Time has come that we practice having a little more patience. Especially in today’s world, it has become an important factor in having the patience to live a peaceful life. Practice. You will be a master in some time.

Most children nowadays behave differently from the children of the past. Some are becoming wild, while few are being bullied. It is very noticeable that most children are impolite, rude and have uncontrolled behavior.  


These challenging children may be attributed to three risk factors that influence their behavior. One is their environment. If a child lives in a wholesome and accepting family, the child is more likely to be gentler, kinder and soft-spoken compare to a child who grew in a troubled, dysfunctional family with a single parent raising him/her.

 


The second factor is the inner experience that the child received from his/her immediate family. These positive or negative inner experiences will dictate how a child will behave as an individual especially when in a group or among peers.



The last and third factor that impacts the behavior of a child is receiving the correct empathy which should start from home. Self-awareness which is one aspect of empathy should be taught earlier to a child. When a child becomes aware of his strengths and weaknesses, he/she turns to be more open to the correction of his/her own misbehavior. The child also tends to be more apprehensive about his/her behavior. He/She can easily distinguish positive or negative emotions which leads to self-management of emotion.



As educator, the teacher should pay close attention to the behavior the students manifest in a class or among his/her friends.  When the teacher approaches the student or the child per se, she should take into consideration what personality does the child possesses and use that the parameter to choose a learning style appropriate and matching to the student. Likewise, since most students are now more open and aggressive, the teacher must motivate them more to choose self-improvement than self-destruction. 

There are times when you want someone by your side, but no one is there to comfort you. You have to deal alone. This is life. You first have to help yourself. Then others can and will. No one can help you better but yourself. Others can just advice or suggest or make you feel light and cheer you up or influence you. It depends on you how you get through the problem.


Sometimes, it is very tough to stay strong. There are times you want to cry out loud. There are times you want to be left alone. There are times you want to run away and take a break. There are times you want to skip a plan and stay at home and there are times when your own sweet home is killing you from inside and you want to get some fresh air. There are times you want to lock yourself in the four walls of your room. And there are times when you just don’t want to stay inside. It is very easy to advice others and give suggestions. But when the same or similar situation comes before you, then you fail to apply your given advices and suggestions.  Funny, isn’t it?



Life takes a turn when you least expect. It indeed is unpredictable. Things get better when you stop expecting. But not expecting is tough because if you love someone and if someone is important to you, then expecting is normal. When you stop expecting, that person no longer holds that special position in your life. Once gone is gone forever.  Quite true. 

23.jpg

Studies conducted by researchers and public reviews taken by analytics departments have shown that over 70% of people are not happy with themselves. More than 40% of those people admitted to experiencing a level of distress and hate when asked about how they feel about themselves. 

A lot of people find it difficult to accept themselves. They often magnify the inherent flaws and obsess over them to the point of exhaustion. This leads to an unhealthy outlook on oneself. People who are not happy with themselves are also seen to lack confidence. This has adverse effects on their social life and career opportunities. 

If you find yourself experiencing self-hate or self-doubt, you are not alone. Here are some ways to deal with these feelings – 




Accept yourself 


The moment you start accepting yourself, half the battle is won. The most difficult part is life is often related to how we see ourselves. This is made worse by prolonged negativity surrounding our self-identity. 

When we dislike ourselves, it becomes difficult for others to like us as well. Which is why the change has to start from within. You have to learn to accept yourself. You have to develop a sense of unconditional self-acceptance. And although this is not easy, it is important. This one step will have the largest impact on how you view yourself.  

24.jpg


Some people almost feel compelled to use social platforms even if has negative effects on their personal, social and psychological well-being.  

This often impacts personality development negatively as people miss out on the opportunities to grow while trying to chase social media updates. People neglect what is present in front of them for the virtual world. This leads to a lack of social and general awareness border lining on absolute ignorance.

Sometimes, they get so obsessed with the likes and fame on social media that they go to extreme lengths to achieve social media popularity. In recent times, news all over the world is filled with instances where teenagers got into serious accidents trying to take a perfect selfie for social media. 


Students often neglect to study for spending time on social media. This has serious consequences on their education. The addiction makes it difficult for them to balance the virtual world with reality. They lose the sense of time and fail to draw the line between what is present in real life and what appears on the screen. 

This leads to a sharp dent in the individual’s personality making him or her mentally and physically weaker. They exhibit a lack of self-control and extremely poor social skills. They succumb to mental health disorders like anxiety, depression and obsessive-compulsive disorder. 

This makes things further difficult for them which in turn affects their personality for the worse. They also drift apart from their friends and family and spend most of their time online. They start isolating themselves from the social world to create an online presence. 

This stunts their social growth and adversely affects the development of a healthy personality. 

25.jpg

One’s personality influences everything from the way you dress, the way you talk, the friends you make and the kind of life you live. 


Define your core beliefs 

Your core beliefs are the strongest foundations of what defines you. Everything you experience in life eventually comes down to your core beliefs. Your perspective on life and subsequent experiences stem from your core beliefs. 

But how do you understand what your core beliefs are?

Basically, your core beliefs are what you believe about yourself and your life to be true. These are mostly intrinsic in nature. They are subjective meaning, they are dependent on your perspective and attitude. 

Everyone has different core beliefs. Some of them may be similar but they are never exactly the same. Hence at the root level, every single person is different.

Your core beliefs are very strong and often motivate you to take certain actions. 

Internal Motivators

When it comes to building a powerful personality, this motivation is also an integral part of the building bases of life. People with higher levels of motivation have a strong personality with defined goals for life. They tend to have an intrinsic drive to achieve things in life. They do not give up in times of difficulty and work-hard to gain substantial rewards throughout their life. 

This is what others often see as a strong personality. They refer to such people as being a high achiever and look up to them. These people often go on to become famous public speakers, life coaches or business owners. 

One of the key aspects of this personality building is to have strong core beliefs and understand how they motivate you. Once you are aware of these important facets of life, it becomes easy, almost automatic to develop a strong personality. 

26.jpg

Once you read personal development books, it is also important to apply what you have learned in your daily life. But how can you apply those lessons in your life without remembering them? The first step is often the most important. That is remembering the content. 




Take Notes of everything you learn through these books 

One of the most effective ways of remembering what you have learned is to take notes. Taking notes is fairly simple yet so effective when it comes to applying lessons in everyday life. It does not require much time and saves a lot of effort in the future. 

You can take notes online through note pad apps for the sake of convenience and easy accessibility. However, if you like the tactile feel of the process, you can opt for writing the notes by hand. This may require you to keep a notebook. The good part about having these notes written down is that written content is better remembered than what you have just read or typed. As writing is a slow process and also involves a lot of senses, the content becomes strongly fit into the memory. 

Another advantage of the written content is accessibility and future reference. We can not always expect ourselves to remember all the lessons at the same time. We often lose important points after a certain period. The best way to prevent this from happening is to have everything written down somewhere so you can easily access it whenever required. All you have to do is open a notebook and you have all the information in one place. 

You can also make an index to keep track of what is written and mention the page numbers to further increase the ease of access. 

27.jpg


Read high-quality complex books and research papers

It is often said you are what you read. The better stuff you read, the more your mind grows to accommodate it. People who read complex books and research papers have significantly higher intellect than those who engage in easy reading. 

However, if you have never attempted reading complex papers, do not start with heavy stuff as this may be difficult initially and discourage you from trying. Instead, start with the material that is one or two levels higher than your usual reading level. 

If you are used to reading page-turners, start with something that is just slightly more complex. However, if you have strong experience of reading complex research papers, take it a few notches higher by reading deep, detailed analysis papers or philosophical content that takes a lot of time and effort to be understood. 

Make friends with people who are more intelligent than you 

Another helpful and effective way to boost your personal and social intellect is to make friends with people who are more intelligent than you. When you hang out with such people, you learn a lot of new things.

You are exposed to a lot of information that you did not know before. You start picking up on their knowledge and start becoming more intelligent yourself. You also start thinking like them which sets your thought process into motion towards developing your intellect. You become more aware of things and move closer to a better understanding of what is happening around you. 


Intellect is not a permanent concept. It is fluid. It can be developed as well as diminished. Your intellect depends on your daily mental and physical engagement.

28.jpg


Read self-help books that promote personal development

Self-help books contain a large pool of helpful knowledge. These books are often written by experts in their respective fields. These contain helpful strategies aimed at helping you develop a good character and learn a better way of leading life. 

Today, there are thousands of self-help books available in the market on almost every topic. There are well-written books on making friends, being more productive, being more creative, waking up early, becoming successful, etc. 

Reading these books gives you all the knowledge at your fingertips. You can instantly access to hundreds of resources that experts have specially created for people looking to invest in personal development. 


Take an online course on personal development 

Best way to invest in personal development is to enroll in online courses that focus on personal development. Today, there are thousands of courses available that focus, especially on personal development. These classes are created to help you learn new strategies to aid in your personal growth.

These courses give you helpful instructions and guide you to make better choices regarding your lifestyle. They provide the essential information required to make positive changes in one’s life. These courses are available on every topic from lifestyle habits to productivity.

The best part about these courses is that they can often be adjusted according to your personal requirements. This adds to the convenience and helps in effective learning. Some of these courses are also free of cost, which makes it even easier to access and use them. They can one of the resources to invest in to promote your personal development exponentially. 

Online courses and self-help books are the most treasured and effective resources for personal development.

29.jpg


Have a firm reason for your goals 

Victor Frankl changed the whole scene of will power and determination through his book Man’s Search For Meaning. In this book, he wrote the famous quote – He who has a strong why can bear almost anyhow. This means that a person with a strong reason for doing something will have the determination to achieve his or her goals despite all the difficulties. 

When you have a strong reason behind your goals, it propels you to maintain your resolve in the tough times and stops you from giving up too easily. 

You can write down your why – that is your reason for doing what you do. You can use this as a reminder when you feel low or when you are about to quit. This will instantly boost your sense of determination and help you move forward and deal with the challenges. 

Develop Intrinsic Motivation 

Intrinsic motivation is much stronger than external motivation. Intrinsic motivation refers to the kind of motivation that comes from within you. This type of motivation originates from a strong internal reason to pursue the goal. An example of intrinsic motivation is the want that originates from the passion for an activity like writing or singing. On the other hand, external motivation is dependent on external factors. These create a powerful but temporary reason to do something. Examples of external motivation include deadlines or other factors that have negative consequences. 

It has been proven time and again that people who are intrinsically motivated are more likely to work hard and push forward towards their goals than people who are externally motivated for minor rewards or avoiding painful consequences.

30.jpg

If you find yourself regularly obsessing over thoughts, here are some ways to stop overthinking. 

1. Write down your thoughts 

Writing down the thoughts that you are obsessing about helps you slow down the train of thought. The activity of writing down the obsessive thoughts gives you a place to put down the thoughts you are overthinking. This helps you understand what you are overthinking slowly.

Writing is slower than thinking. Hence when you begin writing down your thoughts, you eventually start decreasing the speed of overthinking. Over time, this helps you slow down your thoughts and consider them carefully instead of obsessively overthinking them. 

2. Stay mindful of the present moment

Mindfulness is the key to peace of mind. Several teachers, leaders, psychotherapists, and scientists have repeatedly emphasized the importance of mindfulness. 

Mindfulness is the ability to stay in the present moment. When we are overthinking, we are often thinking about past experiences, mistakes or reminiscing memories. On the other hand, we may also think about the future. When we are worrying about our future, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and overthink the future possibilities. 

In both of these cases, mindfulness helps you to center yourself. It keeps you grounded in the present moment without overthinking the future or obsessing over the past. 

Mindfulness helps you realize the significance of the present moment. With regular practice, you become more habituated to staying grounded in the present instead of overthinking about future possibilities or past mistakes. 


Even though one can not completely stop thinking, overthinking can be moderated by implementing regular awareness of the thoughts, writing them down to maintain pace and practicing mindfulness. Both of these techniques have a strong potential to help you keep your mind free of the stress that occurs due to overthinking.

31.jpg

1. Focus on solutions

Recognize your difficulties, but give your ability and energy to answers. You’ve recognized the real causes of your stress and tension, but your work isn’t done. The only way to learn how to prevent overthinking for good is to take charge of your life. In the event that your overthinking is delivered by worry grinding away, reconsider your vocation way.

In case you're not where you need to be throughout everyday life, built up objectives for yourself with the goal that you can arrive. In the event that you feel like life is out of your control, make a choice today to get back behind the wheel. These are great moves, and they take guts. Remember: No one manages your reality but you – don’t you want your life to be amazing?

2. Know the difference between anxiety and intuition

Overthinkers may experience difficulty recognizing the dread of committing an error, which prompts overthinking to the spot where they make no conclusion and a deep feeling that something is wrong. Knowing if fear or intuition is leading your behavior will help you get out of your head and take the next important steps.

By appending to your body, taking a couple of full breaths and truly feeling what it resembles to settle on a choice, you can explain whether fear or intuition are in play and how to best move ahead.

32.jpg

1. Live in the moment

Living in the result is vital to figuring out how to quit overthinking. The vast majority can't simply flip a switch and live in the outcome – or can they? You can take charge of your mind and stop negative emotions in their tracks. Recognize overthinking before it spirals out of control and takes a minute to reset. Exhale and concentrate on the moment – what are you listening to and seeing? What are you thankful for? At first, it will take conscious knowledge. Daily routines like meditation and priming can help you retrain your brain to live in the consequences. Soon you’ll find it comes normally.

2. Take charge on your emotions

Living in the consequence doesn’t mean you should hide your negative emotions. In order to rule your emotions, you need to accept them and recognize their root causes. When you’re feeling worried, dig deeper. It’s often about facing your larger worries, such as not feeling in control of your life or not growing in a way you’d like to be. Become informed of the root causes of your overthinking and you can start making a process to stop it before it starts.

33.jpg

1. Acknowledge your best.

The worry that grounds overthinking is often based on thinking that you aren't good enough--not smart enough or hardworking enough or dedicated enough. Once you've given energy your best, accept it all things considered and realize that, while achievement may depend to some degree on certain things you can't check, you've done what you could do.


2. Be thankful.

You can't have a sorry thought and a thankful thought at the same time, so why not spend the time confidently? Every morning and every evening, make a record of what you are thankful for. Get a gratitude buddy and swap lists so you have an eyewitness to the good things that are around you.



3. Let go of the past

Overthinkers often concentrate on the past, expending energy on “what ifs” and “should haves.” Those who know how to stop overthinking know that the past is just that. It can’t be changed. The only action you can make changes in the meaning you give to it. Allowing go of the past means you don’t let your mistakes manage your future choices – and you don't let terrible things that have been done to you control your feelings. You pardon others and let go of your anger. It’s one of the most meaningful ways you can change your story.

34.jpg

1. Quit holding on for perfection.

This is a major one. For us all who are waiting for perfection, we can quit standing by the present moment. Being ambitious is incredible however focusing on perfection is ridiculous, unreasonable, and incapacitating. The moment you start figuring "This ought to be brilliant" is basically the moment you need to review,"Waiting for perfect is never as intelligent as making progress."

2. Change your view of anxiety.

Whether you're worried because you've failed in the history, or you're scared of trying or overgeneralizing some other mess, recognize that just because things did not work out before does not mean that has to be the result every time. Recognize, every moment is a new beginning, a place to start again.

3. Put a clock to work.

Give yourself a limit. Set a timer for a few minutes and give yourself that opportunity to review, stress, and look at. Once the timer reaches, spend 10 minutes with a pen and paper, writing down all the items that are worrying you, stressing you, or giving you stress. Let it rip. When the 10 minutes reach, throw the paper out and move on--preferably to something enjoyable.

4. Remember you can't predict the future.

No one can foretell the future; all we have is now. If you spend the present time bothering about the future, you are cheating yourself of your time now. Wasting time in the future is simply not fertile. Spend that time instead of on things that give you satisfaction.

35.jpg


1. Mindfulness is the beginning of growth. 

Before you can begin to deliver or adjust to your propensity for overthinking, you need to make sense of how to think about it when it's happening. Whenever you end up questioning or feeling stressed or anxious, step back and take a look at the circumstance and how you're reacting. At that time of mindfulness is the root of the change you need to make.


2. Try not to consider what can turn out severely, yet what can go right. 

When in doubt, overthinking is achieved by a singular inclination: fear. At the point when you focus on all the negative things that may occur, it's anything but difficult to get disabled. Next time you sense that you beginning to turning toward that way stop. Envision all the things that can go right and keep those contemplations present and direct.


3. Distract yourself into happiness.

Once in a while, it's useful to have an approach to divert yourself with upbeat, positive, solid other options. Things like intervention, dancing, workout, learning an instrument, drawing, and painting can separate you from the issues enough to close down the overanalysis.

4. Put things into perspective. 

It's for each situation easy to make things bigger and more negative than they ought to be. Whenever you find yourself making a mountain out of a molehill, question yourself the amount it will matter in five years. Or on the other hand, so great as that is affected, one month from now. Simply this honest inquiry, switching up the time span, can help shut down overthinking.

36.jpg

Overthinking doesn't sound so terrible casually - thinking is acceptable, correct? 

Be that as it may, overthinking can cause problems. 

Exactly when you overthink, your choices get shady and your stress gets raised. You put an over the top measure of energy in negative things. It can get difficult to act.

In the event that this feels like well-a known area to you, here are 15 basic plans to free yourself from overthinking.

    1. Mindfulness is the beginning of growth. 

    2. Try not to consider what can turn out severely, yet what can go right. 

    3. Distract yourself into happiness.

    4. Put things into perspective. 

    5. Quit holding on for perfection.

    6. Change your view of anxiety.

    7. Put a clock to work.


    8. Remember you can't predict the future.


    9. Acknowledge your best.

    10. Be thankful.

    11. Let go of the past

    12. Live in the moment

    13. Take charge on your emotions

    14. Focus on solutions

    15. Know the difference between anxiety and intuition

      Once you learn how to stop overthinking and live in the moment, you’ll be more fortunate, more rested and have a positive impact on those around you. Continuously perceive that life occurs for you, not to you. Indeed, even your negative feelings can prompt positive results if you operate them as gifts that have been given to help you develop. 

      37.jpg


      1. Step by step get rid of negativity


      Change doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time. Same way, get rid of negativity step by step from your life. Negativity can be in any form that does bad things to your physical and mental health. Gradually step away from negativity. Don’t encourage or support negativity in any way.


      2. Step away from demotivating, and disrespecting people


      There are few bad influencers who will never accept their mistakes. We can see people disrespecting other people. Furthermore, the act of Demotivating is the worst thing you can do to someone who is filled with dreams.




      People who disrespect and demotivate should be avoided from all walks of life i.e. personal, professional, business, friendship, etc. Get rid of all such negative people and you can see your life improving drastically.

      38.jpg


      1. Learn Good Things:


      Starting with a simple act of smiling, greeting people, extending help & support to one another, life offers so many great things to you. Use them to improve your life. appreciate people who are with you. Count the blessings you have. There are lots of good things like this to learn to improve your life.


      2. Mindfulness:


      Being mindful of people, places and situations around you are important to improve your life. Not just people, but be mindful of your own self.


      3. Let yourself out:


      Express yourself through hobbies. Take it as a platform to let go of all the stress and wavering you have. Follow any Creative Hobby such as doodling, art, painting, trekking, and cycling.

      To take a step further, we can see people following different types of martial arts, kickboxing, and other intense disciplines to let themselves out especially during difficult times in life. Everyone should need a hobby that should strengthen them physically and mentally. Take this lesson as a key to improve you.


      4. Wake up Early:


      Waking up early gives plenty of time for you to start the day well. Early morning times are productive times. Bring the habit of waking early in the morning. It’s an easy way to improve your life.


      5. Practice a habit of doing one good thing daily:


      Take it as a challenge and start doing it. Do one good thing daily. Start by waking up early and do things that you like. Help anyone if you can.

      Buying lunch for your colleagues, helping, supporting, welcoming, and accepting people are all good things that you can do daily.