We, humans, are so blessed that we have feelings and the authority to express them. Therefore, I would say feelings are the only foundation for a relationship.
Whatever relationship we have in our life, let me say, the husband and wife, friends, mother and kids, father and children, and so kind of relations; we are bound to it.
I won't say, only humans have feelings. Animals also have it. But, human's strength and liberty have to deal with their feelings no other animal has. And it makes humans unique and blessed.
Indeed, humans have the blessings; still, why would humans handle their relationships with their partner or friends, or parents. Unfortunately, we can often see that it has been widespread to break the relationship, not respecting the other one in the same relation, breakups, and so on.
Well, it is a sensitive topic to discuss. And, I think everyone should spend their little time on repairing their so-called toxic relationships; they want to get free from.
So, today I'm going to discuss the same topic; Toxic Relationships. It would be best if you be with me throughout the article. And see where your relations are going wrong and try to repair it.
What is the relationship?
When you decode the word, Relationship, you get two terms; Relation + Ship. This means the relationship is just not a word but has a deep meaning like a sea, as only a ship can survive on the surface of an ocean.
Relationship refers to the connection between two people, entities, assets, etc. At the same time, the relationship between two people is more alive. Why is this so?
As I said earlier, humans have a reward that they can express their feeling about the other person; they can speak, laugh, cry, shout, and so on emotions, which has a direct effect on their life. And so on, relationships.
Let me explain it with an example, when two people are attracted towards each other romantically, we call it a love relationship. On the other hand, when two people get attracted to each other with anger and hate, we can call it an enemy relationship.
This proves that your feelings decide what kind of relationship you will share with the other person.
What does toxic means?
Toxic may have different meanings, as per the position it holds. But, overall, it comes to the same end.
Toxic refers to Poisonous.
In relation, toxic elements play a crucial role in ending it. But, I would like to say that the relationships are never unhealthy, but the people involved in the relationship can be harmful, making it a toxic relationship.
Now the point is, how will you know what behavior is toxic which is harmful to your relationship. Have a look;
A person who is emotionally unhealthy, abusive, and unsupportive is a toxic mentality person can hold. They never bring you up but always pulls you down. They may make you feel dependent on their opinion, and you started doubting your own, which is toxic behavior.
Whenever you start to feel like such vibes from anyone, you need to be aware that you are being with someone who is turning poisonous for you.
What is a toxic relationship?
You need to know that your relationship is turning toxic rather than a lovely connection. But, how would you identify that your relationship is turning toxic?
Well, let me help you.
We can explain a toxic relationship as the connection between controlling behavior, lack of trust, frequent lying, not respecting each other, and the opinion, doubting, putting a brake to the freedom, etc.
A relationship is meant to be a lovely feeling and a strong bond, where two-person love each other, care for and respect each other, allowing the required space for each other.
Thus, the relationship grows. But, if you feel your partner is dominating you on any of the topics, they are not respecting your freedoms and thoughts, you start feeling suffocating.
A perfect relationship develops when two-person work as a team. But, if you feel only your efforts are visible and another person is more authoritative with you, you might be in a toxic relationship.
Signs of a toxic relationship
Let's try to find out the sign of a toxic relationship.
Basically, lack of empathy is a cause of a toxic relationship. In other words, being in a relationship, if one partner feels that, other is refusing to know things from their point of view, they expect you to live your life according to their rules, which can be the primary signs for a toxic relationship.
Toxic behavior can be defined as the inability to understand the other person's feelings, not feel genuine compassion, etc. Yet, at the same time, these are the most common reasons.
Moreover, find the signs of toxic relationships below;
1. A dominating behavior
2. Frequent lies
3. Making you live your life according to plan
4. Frequent doubting
5. Putting a break on your freedom
6. Not respecting you and your thoughts
7. Refusing to see things from your side
8. Lack of trust,
And so on. These are some common signs that; you are in a toxic relationship.
Toxic person definition in terms of husband, wife, boyfriend, and girlfriend
We can't differentiate the toxicity in a relationship based on its status. Like, we can't define toxic persons in terms of husband, wife, boyfriend, and girlfriend. The toxic mentality is almost the same in every people, and in every case, irrespective of the relationship they share.
Whereas, you can find;
➤ Toxic people want to get whatever they want at any cost. So, they are manipulative.
➤ They can lie up to any point to save themselves or hide the truth to fulfill their intention.
➤ They will not think before bending the truth as per their convenience to make themselves satisfied.
➤ They can do whatever they feel, without caring for the people, and knowing it can hurt others.
Also, the relationship of a husband and wife and a girlfriend and boyfriend have intimacy in it. So, it is also possible that, in such a case, one partner may demand sex, where the other is not even interested. In such a case, one or the other partner starts having toxic thoughts harmful to their relationship.
What is a toxic person?
As I explained before, toxic people can be identified with their harmful behavior. To understand it more, let me explain what a toxic person is, based on their behavior with you. So, please go through the list below;
➤ When you feel like someone is manipulating you to do something you don't want to do, a toxic person surrounds you.
➤ If you feel someone should apologize, but they never care about it and don't ask you for your apology, it is one of the signs of a toxic person.
➤ Whatever you do, whether for it was for their benefit or their sake, and still, you have to define yourself to doing it, you are living with a toxic person.
➤ Another one is, your partner is constantly disliking your behavior and blaming you for whatever happens with them, good or bad; you might be with a toxic person.
➤ If you always feel uncomfortable being with someone due to their strange behavior, they might be a toxic person.
➤ If you always have to answer for each of your actions to your partner, they might be suffering from a toxic mentality, etc.
A toxic person can not hide their toxic behavior. So, this makes you identify them easily. But, because you love them, never ignore these signs before it is too late.
Is love toxic?
Love is the most beautiful feeling and key to a successful relationship. When you are in love, you respect each other, care for each other, are aware of the space they the individual partner needs, care about the freedom of each other, and so on.
When your relationship had a foundation of care, respect, love, and understanding, it is a beautiful bond. And it can not turn to toxic ties ever. And true love can not be tainted.
This doesn't mean life can not be a toxic love at all.
When any of the partners starts feeling overwhelming due to the actions of others, the toxicity has entered your relationship.
If you don't work as a team
➤ The dominant partner is involved
➤ The freedom is lost
➤ The lying is entered
➤ The dependency started growing
➤ The abusive behavior starting raising
When you can realize these feelings are accumulating in your love, it has turned into toxic love.
The reason behind this toxic love could be; you are in love; your partner is your world. You start giving importance to the relationship and neglecting other relations like friends and family.
You compromise with your liking by putting your partner's opinion on top. You start losing yourself over your partner; this leads to turning love into toxic love.
How to get out of a toxic relationship?
Now that you know you are in a toxic relationship that has made your life not less than hell, you need to either fix it or get out of it, which is essential to healing yourself at first.
So, let's first discuss how to get out of the toxic relationship.
Know the signs that a toxic relationship involves.
This is the first and essential step you need to take care of, that you have identified you are in a toxic relationship.
Channelize your feelings.
Give yourself importance and put your feelings on top. Start thinking about your sense before escaping from the situation. When you do so, you can learn what you want to do.
Take care of your safety first
Toxic people can be harmful. They can do anything to make you act like they want you to do. So, always take care of your safety before taking any action to get out of the relationship.
Cut off the communication
It would be best to cut off the communication with the person you are in a relationship with. This can be the best way to avoid them, for instance.
Always remember to get support from wherever you can. It doesn't matter if you are seeking help from professionals. It always works.
Give yourself time to heal from the toxic relationship.
If you have separated from the relationship with your partner physically, it will take time to get separated from them mentally. So, be with a happy environment and people to get out of it.
How to fix a toxic relationship?
It's not like that; you can not work on your toxic relationship and fix it. Indeed you can do it, and it can have a visible result in your healing relationship. But, yes, I would say that the practice to heal your toxic relationship should be done from both sides.
Let's try to understand how you can fix your toxic relationship.
Stop being in the past
You are never stuck in the past. Everyone has a history. Some people have sound, and some may have bad times. But, if it affects your today's world, it needs to stop being in the past and living at those moments. Never remind those bad moments in your today's life to make your partner realize their mistake.
Understand your partner
A basic understanding of the thread in a relationship that holds two people on the same bond. If you can't hold this thread, it will break soon. Likewise, if you don't want to see the matters from your partner's point of view, they won't work.
Take professional help
It is not wrong to take professional help to heal your relationship and fix your toxic behavior. You can indeed go with it.
Find support from your loved ones
You also can find support from your loved ones or a partner to heal your relationship. This way always works to get out of your toxic mentality. You are so fixing the relationship.
Have healthy communication with your partner.
Start talking about the good memories, the happy days, the topics that make you feel satisfied. This also can be one of the ways to fix your relationship.
Work on your conflicts.
It might be possible; if you feel in a toxic relationship, your partner may also feel the same. This is due to the battles you have. So try resolving it.
Give space to each other.
Even if being in a relationship, you have rights in each other's area. But still, it also has a limit. Do not enter into each additional room. Give them their freedom space. Otherwise, it may go to the worst condition.
Wherever your relationship stands, you can fix the toxicity in your relationship. But, it has a condition that both the partners to involve in the process. If one is trying, and the other is not bothering, it will not work at all.
Toxic traits in a relationship
If you find the listed qualities in your relationship, you need to know that you might be in the wrong and toxic relationship.
1. Aggressive communication of your partner.
2. Your partner doesn't trust you at all.
3. Your partner wants to control you the way they want to.
4. You know, your partner has started lying to you.
5. You can notice that you are pitting the efforts to fix your relationship, and your partner is not even bothering you.
6. If someone asks you about your partner's weird behavior, you are making excuses to hide it.
7. You have a lot your freedom.
Well, these are a few of the traits that clearly say you are in a toxic relationship.
How to stop being toxic?
If you have noticed yourself being toxic, it's a great thing, and you want to stop being toxic; it's a significant step towards self-love.
So, to stop being toxic, you can follow the listed points to fix your life.
❖ Eliminate the toxic guys that are leading you towards being toxic. So many times, the guilt makes feeling toxic. So, it's better to remove them.
❖ Start working on self-care. Do whatever you like, eat your favorite food, go to the movies, meet friends, and so on. It will help you.
❖ Start loving yourself. Toxic mentality down lets other people live peacefully, nor yourself. Start to love yourself first. If you can love yourself, you will not change your mind to think the wrong things.
❖ You need to know; you can't get respect for being a negative person. This realization will help you a lot.
❖ Start mindfulness practice to feel mindfulness.
❖ Eat healthy food. Avoid toxic drinks and food.
This list may help you to turn to be a good person.
How to know when to end a relationship?
There may be different reasons to end a relationship, depending on the status of your bond. So, before your relationship turns toxic, it is better to end it.
If you want to know when to end your relationship, see the list below;
➤ If you don't feel the same bond with your partner as before, you love someone else; you seek emotional and physical fulfillment from others, it's high time to break your relationship. This is precisely the same for your partner. If you feel these things in your partner, it's an alarm.
➤ Other than this, if you feel your partner is taking your relationship towards a toxic one, and you can't fix it, you should break it.
➤ You feel scared of your partner to ask for something you need. In a relationship, fear doesn't exist.
➤ When your needs are not meeting, you need to break the relationship.
➤ It's not always the case, but if your family and friends oppose the relationship, it's better to end it.
➤ If you feel you are forcefully in a relationship, it's time to end it to be happy.
Look at the list and see what your case is to end your relationship.
Signs she doesn't want a relationship with you.
It's important to know that your partner is equally involved with you in your relationship. If only one person is involved, the relationship won't work at all. Talking about her involvement in a relationship, let's see how to know if she is interested in a relationship. Look at the list below;
❖ She started doing everything for herself only.
❖ She doesn't involve you in any of the work that you should be in.
❖ She doesn't do anything special for you anymore.
❖ She clearly tells you that she is interested in someone else.
❖ She always wants to work on herself only.
❖ She doesn't feel jealous of seeing you with anyone else.
❖ She says, 'it's me only, and not us or you.'
❖ She has stopped caring for you.
These are some common signs telling you that she doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore now.
How to leave someone you love?
Leaving someone you love, is not an easy task, but it hurts you to do it. At the same time, it became necessary sometimes to do it. When you are also at the point where you have to leave someone you love, see the list below to find the solution.
➤ Tell your decision face to face, instead of informing it on the phone or chat.
➤ Be honest about your decision. Don't lie for any of the points. But, at the same time, avoided long explanations for your action.
➤ Your partner will surely get shocked hearing your decision. So, don't expect that your partner will understand or agree with your decision.
➤ Disagree with the urge to be friends.
➤ It would be best if you set the limits of the discussion.
➤ Be mentally prepared after the post-breakup conditions.
These are the easiest ways to leave your loved one.
How to move on from a toxic relationship?
Even if you have separated yourself from the person, you are in a suffocating relationship, but you loved them. So, it will not be easy to move on from such a condition quickly. But, as of now, you have decided to move on; you need to do it by following the tips listed below.
❖ You should realize that you don't deserve such a toxic relationship and have a right to have a healthy love. This way, you can find mental peace and satisfaction.
❖ You need to agree that you were in a bad relationship, which was so toxic. And you couldn't survive in such a condition.
❖ Never forget your existence. Remember, who you are, and what your value is. This way, you will feel confident about your decision.
❖ Don't only think about the past or the steps you need to take to deal with the condition, but you also need to take practical actions.
❖ Never hope for an apology from your partner. It will break you and hold you in the same place.
❖ It would help if you surrounded yourself with positivity to cope up with the situation. You need to start loving yourself. Realize self-value.
❖ Take on forgiveness. Don't expect too much from others.
Signs of lack of respect in a relationship
A relationship can stand only when both the people in it serve equal respect to each other. Without care, the relationship can't go long. And, you won't be able to do save it then. But, how will you know if you have that void in your relationship? Look at the list.
➤ Your partner doesn't care about your opinions. Whenever there is respect in any of the relationships, the people in the relationship listen and watch what you are saying. So, if this is missing in your relationship, you need to be aware.
➤ There is no respect for personal space. Even if your relationship shouldn't have any secrets, still, there should be a private space to skillet your relationship breath.
➤ If you have poor communication, it is a sign of a lack of respect. But, of course, transmission is essential in your relationship. And, it should be done regularly to resolve the issues and differences.
➤ If you don't feel supportive, professionally, emotionally, your partner doesn't respect you. It's evident that if your partner wants to dominate you over your opinions and doesn't support you for your decision, they don't respect you.
➤ If your partner often makes a quick judgment for you, they don't respect you at all. Quick decisions can create conflicts, and thus the relationship can weaken.
Toxic relationships psychology point of view
In simple words, when toxicity enters into your relationship, it becomes a toxic relationship. Of course, you can also call it an unhealthy relationship. But, it is not a good status for your relationship at all.
A toxic relationship or marriage includes the frequent unhealthy pattern and mutual destruction that negatively impacts both the people in a relationship than the good ones.
The feeling of jealousy, possessiveness, manipulation, domination, fear, anger, or abusive actions can lead the toxic relationships.
Also, the partners may start feeling to be together all the time, without considering the impact of their behavior on the other one. All their actions are just to be with the person and keep a hold on their bond. And, they entirely neglect the quality of the time they are spending together.
These conditions can make the other partner feel suffocating in a relationship. Whereas the dominating person starts having control over others, they begin to get confused between love and dominating actions. According to them, they are in love with the person, and they can do it.
This behavior shows the person's mental disorder or needs psychological help, but they don't want to expect it. Even if they are suggested to do it, they can't handle the fact.
How to stop being controlling in a relationship?
If you have realized that you are being controlled in a relationship, and you want to stop yourself from being the one, you need to take some actions to stop yourself from being controlling. So, look at the point below and find the ways to do it.
➤ Look at the way you are communicating with your partner. It might be controlled for them. Look at the points, the method of talking, telling, suggesting, etc. All they have a different accent to speak.
➤ Challenge your fear that is making you controlling love your partner. Yes, free can be one of the reasons for being a controlling person in your relationship.
➤ Accept the fact, whatever the matter is. You can control the truth, and so, you want to control your partner. This feels like suffocating in a relationship.
➤ Be free to talk. Don't make your partner feel like you won't understand them, but only scold them or argue with them. Such feelings are generated from your previous actions.
➤ Be calm by practicing meditation. When you look into yourself, you get to know the voids you have and work on them. It can be the best way to do it.
Can a toxic relationship be saved?
If you wish to heal and fix the problem genuinely, they are easy to do it. But, you must be honest in the act.
Toxic relationships are not something that can not be fixed at all. But yes, they will take time to get heal. Along with the time, it will need diligence and patience.
Before turning to the solution of how to do it, you need to know the reason for the current toxic status of your relationship. The most common causes are
the long withheld issues,
Never discussed problems,
History of a person,
Unhealthy family relationships,
Underestimated issues, etc.
No problems in the list are non-curable. The critical need is to communicate properly about the situation and try to solve it. This can be the best solution to do it.
Otherwise, you can also consult a professional to help you. You also can find tips on resolving your toxic conflict relationship in the above sections as well.
How to get out of a controlling relationship?
Controlling a relationship can make you exhausted from being in a relationship, and indeed, you want to get out of such phase. Moreover, it is not easy to leave someone you truly loved, but sometimes you need to choose between yourself and the person you love. But, the person you loved does not remain the same as before. This makes you decide whether you want to be in a relationship or not.
So, if you are looking for ways to get out of such relationships, try out these tips.
➤ Make sure you are leaving the relationship with all the safety. What I mean to say is, for some people, getting out of any relationship is just a conversation of a good buy. But for some people, it is way more complicated than just a talk. So, you need to make sure you have accessed your safety before doing it.
➤ Check out all the possibilities that make you feel safe and confident to get out of it. This will be the best way to deal with the situation.
➤ It would help if you kept self-care on priority. Always pay attention to yourself and self-care and self-love.
➤ It is not a wrong decision to seek help to get out of such relationships. However, if you cannot find the right ways to do it, never think before taking help from others.
➤ If you are living with a person for a long time, leaving them or not, can be the most confusing question for you. You should know, your feelings can be mixed. But, never forget the current situation.
These tips are more helpful to deal with your condition.
How to stop going back to a toxic relationship?
When you leave any relationship with someone you truly loved, it doesn't your love for them is over. But, it means that you have chosen yourself over the suffocating conditions.
However, you might often feel like going back to the person and give them a second chance. But, the inner surface of yours knows that they don't deserve it. So, you need to stop yourself from being emotionally weak to go to them in this condition. To do this, check the suggestions to stop yourself.
➤ Never forget the conditions you have gone through. This will only happen when you realize your self-respect and self-love. Don't let die these feelings of loving yourself.
➤ Accept that you are no more in a relationship with the person. This will help you face reality. And you don't have to look back at them.
➤ Forgive yourself for breaking up the relationship. It is not always essential to carry the burden of a toxic relationship that you don't deserve. It would help if you moved on now. Let the present make you happy and not awful.
➤ You need to avoid drugs or alcohol. These things beings bad memories along with them. That later makes you feel sad. You need to forget them and not to remind them. So, it is better if you stop yourself from going to be addicted to these things.
How to fix an emotionally draining relationship?
If it is a relationship, you will have to deal with conflicts, differences in opinions, etc. But, at the same time, these things can make you emotionally weak and can drain your energy. So, you should try to fix them, rather than running away from them.
To do this, you can find the tips below;
➤ Try to look for the problem first. Until you don't know the problem, how would you be able to fix the problem? So, it is essential to understand the situation.
➤ Once you find the problem, You need to talk about it with your partner. If your conflicts can be resolved by talking, you should definitely go for the talks before anything else.
➤ It would help if you prioritized yourself over any of the issues you have. First, you need to understand what do you want out of the relationship. If you wish to leave the relationship, you can go for it too.
➤ Don't think about the reason for the problem. It will not solve your issue. But it will boost it up. Rather than this, try to concentrate on the solution, and focus on, what you can do.
➤ You need to believe in yourself that you can deal with this situation. If you know your capability, you will be able to do it.
➤ To fix the relationship, you need to be emotionally intense. To be strong, you need to take care of yourself if you are healthy and will be able to deal with the situation better.
➤ Don't impose your point of view on your partner. Instead, always try to listen and understand what they feel and say. This will help you to fix your relationship and will boost the bond you share.
Try out these tips, and see if they work or not.
How to fix an unhealthy relationship?
Your healthy relationship is turned into an unhealthy one; you can make the spinning from an unhealthy relationship to the healthy one. You only will have to work on yourself and on the connection to do this. Look at the most straightforward tips to fix and deal with your damaged relationship.
➤ If you feel, make sure you are taking the help of people other than you two. It can be the family, friends, or professionals.
➤ Don't forget to wipe out the past from your present. It will have a significant impact in your today's world.
➤ Never lose the opportunity to show your partner compassion. They might be looking for your actions to show your love to them.
➤ It is also okay if you start therapy for the broken relationship to heal it.
➤ You need to work on yourself individually. Even if you both have to resolve the issue together, individual healing is also necessary.
➤ Take your time and let your partner take them to deal with and heal the situation. Fast work doesn't work out. So, it is advisable if you do it.
➤ Start having healthy conversations as communication is the key to resolve the issues.
How do relationships work?
Human is a social animal. And they can't live alone in society. At the same time, people don't let someone live alone. Moreover, psychologically, if someone lives alone throughout their life, they are deemed to be unhappy.
Thus, a human has several relations with the people around them, let me say, the friends, the partner, the parents, the neighbors, and so on. They are never alone.
The relationships give a human to live their life. And they don't live for themselves only.
A relationship is meant to be the support for each person always. Whereas the association gives a person the strength to deal with their difficult times, get happy in their success, cry in their sorrows, get upset, get angry, etc.
Imagine yourself without any of the relations you have throughout your life. You will find yourself nill, without any of the emotions.
If I mainly talk about the relationship that a couple of shares, it should grow individual partners. Not one should hold someone for the sake of their ego, or unsecured feelings, or jealousy. This way, no relationship can work at all.
Nothing is perfect in the world, so the relationships. But, when two distinct nature meets, they need to compromise at someplace, need to understand other, need to change at a point, and new to make a lot of adjustment to make their relationship perfect. Well, I have covered a lot of things that are involved in a toxic relationship.
I hope you find it helpful to deal with your current situation. Whatever the case is, remember you are not bad enough to leave the person or the problem, but the conditions that you are facing are more worst than you are thinking. So, be strong and make good decisions.